Deleted Scene: Cane’s POV from after ‘almost sex’
The kitchen was lit only by the light above the stovetop, the only sound came from the fork that I sat down beside my plate.
I looked down at the steak and baked potato Penny had left for me. It was my favorite meal. On most nights, I would have finished it in a few minutes. But this wasn’t just any other night and the fact that this meal didn’t do shit for me wasn’t Penny’s fault - it was all on me.
I put the fork down and gazed out the window.
‘I’m that girl.’
Damn it, Jada. I wish you were. I really fucking wish you were.
I shoved the chair back and headed up stairs to the master bathroom. I ripped off my shirt and turned on the shower to the hottest setting.
Maybe the water will boil some fucking sense into me. Or boil some feelings out of me.
Either way - I’d take it.
I undressed and tossed my clothes on the floor, watching the change from my pockets scatter across the tile. I tested the water before getting beneath the shower head. I let the water beat down on me, pelting me with all the force it had. I closed my eyes and immediately saw Jada in her bed and the look on her face as I left her room.
I had to walk out. I couldn’t do that to her.
I bit out a laugh at my attempt to convince myself I did the right thing.
This is fucked up. I’m mulling over the reasons why I didn’t fuck someone.
The irony was not lost on me; it was typically the reverse. I’d be trying to remind myself why I chose this girl or that one—definitely not wondering why I didn’t.
Especially when she wanted me and I wanted her so fucking bad. I wanted her so bad that it almost made me sick to my stomach. And the fact that I left her there did leave me sick to my stomach.
It had to be done.
I grabbed the body wash and squirted some in my hands. I rubbed them together and watched the suds form. The transformation of gel to bubbles caught my attention as a little boy and I still found myself watching it happen more often than not. The transformation was pretty cool - something so thick could turn into something so different with a little outside influence.
Is that what happened with Jada? Did she transform because of my persuasion? Or did she really want me?
Blowing out a breath, I ran my soapy hands over my body and then let the water rinse it all off. I put my hands against the tile wall and stood under the downpour, trying to let my head clear.
But that didn’t happen.
I felt as torn when I got out as I did when I got in.
I wanted this girl in ways I had never wanted anyone. I couldn’t get her out of my mind. A part of me hoped that if I finally broke her down and got her in bed, maybe the fascination I had with her would end. Maybe she’d be like every other woman on the planet and get all clingy and I’d have my fill.
I grabbed a towel off the rack and wrapped it around my waist. The bathroom mirror was fogged and I wiped it with my hand. I gazed at my reflection through the streaks.
“What are we doing, Alexander?” My reflection just stared back and offered no suggestions. “What if this isn’t some obsession? What if this is what it feels like to want only one woman?”
I grimaced, the sound of those words coming out of my mouth and echoing around the room almost physically hurt.
Fucking hell.
I flipped off the light and walked into my bedroom and sat on the bed.
I could call her …
I picked up my cell.
And say what?
I sat it back down.
I fell back on the comforter and allowed myself to think about things I had never thought of before ... like what the room would seem like with Jada in it.
Would my bed feel different with her in it? Would my house have the same warmth I felt when I walked into hers?
I took a deep breath as the next thought came barreling into my mind.
Would I have that little bit of peace that I only found when she was around?
I hadn’t felt that since my dad passed away - the feeling of being right where I was supposed to be. The feeling of being able to relax and not scrambling to the next thing ... or person. Feeling like all was right with the world for a moment or two.
I’d walked away from Jada, and I deserved a fucking medal for accomplishing that. But I figured once I got home, I’d call someone in my contacts list and go on about my night.
But I didn’t want to do that. I honest-to-God didn’t want to do that.
I just wanted her.
I wanted my hands in her hair, her legs wrapped around my waist, her lips on mine. I wanted my hands on her ass, my chest against hers—every part of me that could physically be touching her making contact.
Caressing.
Touching.
Feeling.
Who the hell am I?
I’m someone that can’t fuck up her life with my debauchery. That’s fuckin’ who.
The weight of reality hit me with full force again and I tumbled out of fantasyland.
She knows who I am and if she wants me, really wants me, she’ll call me.
Until then, I need to stay away from her.
For her own good.
And mine.
Links:
The Exception -
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Adriana -
Facebook - www.facebook.com/
Website - www.adrianalocke.com
Synopsis:
There are exceptions to every rule...
Jada Stanley is starting over--freeing herself from her past and all her mistakes. Following the rules she's given herself is easy enough, until she meets HIM. He’s gorgeous, cocky, and everything she needs to avoid, but that’s easier said than done.
Cane Alexander has his own set of rules, a plan to keep his life simple and free of complications. But Jada is a temptation he can't resist.
As their lives entwine, they realize one thing about rules... There is always an exception.
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